I shouldn’t be the superhero’s girlfriend. I should be the superhero.”

(Source: feelsrk, via whatamidoingwithmylif)

siderealscion:

mALEFISHIENT, MARK

ive been meaning to make work-related comics forever, so enjoy some choice movie title bastardizations.

(these all actually, seriously, happened, with no humor or awareness on the part of the customer at the time as far as I could tell. so, yes, someone actually asked for a ticket to “Detergent” with a straight face.)

(via iamthewhitegirl)

lydiaamartin:

*applies for architecture job*

experience: building houses on the sims since 2001

(Source: underdosing, via internetusers)

breakfastburritoe:

*drinks water to avoid talking*

(via spoken-not-written)

If you were in a different body, would you have the same personality?


Chest deep, I risked my phone’s life to take this

Chest deep, I risked my phone’s life to take this

(Source: enlightened-globetrotter, via hotwinger)

theonion:

Police Satisfied After Drunk Man Assures Them There’s No Problem

batmansymbol:

batmansymbol:

if it’s late enough and you’re lonely enough, the carly rae jepsen lyric “before you came into my life i missed you so bad” starts seeming increasingly deep and emotionally complex

3:02 AM and this fucking lyric looks like fucking nietzsche

stare into the abyss and the abyss will call you maybe

(via lesbiens)

railroadsoftware:

bro you look so cute right now dude. dude you are so fucking adorable 

(via astyth)

(Source: drownerrs, via chainsawpunk)

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